Stripper Lohan
Friday, December 29th, 2006Yeah Yeah Yeah I know it has been almost a week since I updated last, but I have been busy with Christmas and work and everything, so away I go.
Oscar-winning actress Julia Roberts, who gave birth to twins two years ago, is expecting her third child, her publicist told People magazine on Friday.Roberts, 39, is due this summer, spokeswoman Marcy Engelman said on the magazine’s Web site (www.people.com). News of the movie star’s pregnancy first surfaced in the New York Post on Friday.Roberts, who won an Oscar as best actress for her 2000 role in “Erin Brockovich” and made her Broadway debut this year in “Three Days of Rain,” gave birth to twins Phinnaeus and Hazel in November 2004. Good for her. But please Jules baby, please pick a normal name for your new baby. May I suggest mango. Phinnaeus sounds like a pig’s name.
Former heavyweight boxing champion Mike Tyson was arrested and charged with driving under the influence in Arizona, police said on Friday. “He has been charged with DUI (driving under the influence) and booked into the 4th Avenue Jail in Phoenix,” said a spokeswoman for the Buckeye Police Department, adding that Tyson was due to appear in court later on Friday. Mike, all you had to do was lay some old hags at Heidi Fleiss’s stud farm and you go and do this. Get your shizznit together brotha.
Singer Mariah Carey is appealing to the Patent And Trademark Office to ban porn star Mary Carey from trademarking her name, claiming their identical surnames could confuse fans. The star’s company Automatic Princess Holdings claims Mary’s bid to trademark her name to use in adult entertainment products will confuse consumers. Mariah claims the public is “likely to mistakenly associate the goods offered” by Mary with the singer’s “goods and services.” Wow, I guess this goes in with the famous law suits against Michael J Cox, and Arnold Schwartzenpecker. Ha, oh that old gag.

Michael Jackson is preparing himself for a return to showbiz with a series of comeback gigs in Las Vegas. The star is in talks with concert promoters in order to relaunch his career, and has flown back to the U.S. to strike a million-dollar deal with show organizers. Promoter Jack Wishna says, “We are working on several projects. “He is one of the greatest entertainers in the world and is poised to return to the top.”
Ok 2 more stories to report, and then it is time for me to get my drink on.
The National Enquirer’s Mike Walker reports that while partying at Area, Britney Spears accidentally lit the filter end of her cigarette, which flamed as she inhaled it. Paris Hilton watched it go down and gasped, telling the newly single singer, “Oh my God! Don’t you know that lighting a cigarette the wrong way and inhaling stops the blood flow to your private parts… and doing it more than once means you may never experience orgasm again!” A horrified Britney responded, “Oh, no!” and for the next ten minutes, kept asking everyone if they’d ever heard of such a thing and what should she do. The heiress finally admitted she was just kidding and told Spears, “but I had you going, didn’t I?” Britney then slapped Paris on the arm, and the pair started girlie-wrestling. Oh that Paris, always down for a good time.
And finally,
The New York Post reports Lindsay Lohan was apologetic on a visit toScores West for three hours early Wednesday (December 27) after a leaked e-mail quoted the 20-year-old calling strippers all “whores.” Lohan said when entering the club, “I love strippers.” A tipster told the tab: “She got up on the stripper pole and began to dance with the Scores Girls with 400 customers cheering her on. Then, she joined her entourage of 15 in the VIP area, and got lap dances from many of the girls, including a special double-dance from two strippers at once. It was hot. But while everybody was drinking, Lindsay was not. It was strictly Perrier for her. Wow I can not wait to see that movie at blockbuster.

You Know The Drill
Mango Out


